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63 entries this month
23:09 Oct 31 2014
Times Read: 510
Photoshop...I've lost my touch, I was supposed to make some things for a friend's profile...and blugh. I'm awful. I noticed a thread in this coven's forum offering up a space for members to post coven related graphics they may make. I tried making a banner...no go. I'm just awful. The things I used to make weren't that great but they were good...but now...no.
21:23 Oct 31 2014
Times Read: 516
I haven't been as active here as I had been...and that sucks. I'm not sure why. I haven't been doing other things haha. Maybe I've been here, I just haven't spoken to people or made graphics for people so it feels like I haven't been. I can't remember. My memory is foggy.
Hm....
Today is Halloween. I worked this morning...and we weren't as busy as I had hoped us to be. The day went by slow. The day before yesterday, I caught three women stealing hundreds and hundreds of dollars worth of cosmetics and things. They even wore a ton of clothes out of the store, from the rack. I had been busy in the back and apparently everyone else was clueless. Anyway, we didn't catch them, they ran out of the store and sped off. Today a regular customer stole one tiny thing and my manager made it into a big deal. I don't know. I don't condone stealing at all, but a lot of the time I try not to get involved because it isn't my business and I'm not dying over some mascara...but it just made me feel weird that she didn't make as big of a deal out of the major theft as she did over the tiny theft. I guess it was because the three women were from out of state and she knew they would never be caught?
Possibly.
Also, it's 2014 and I don't feel that I should have to explain myself, and I wouldn't have to on tumblr, but as far as the make up thing goes, it was for fun, for the sake of the photo and it will happen again. I've gotten into drag performances and artists lately and I find it interesting (adore Delano, sharon needles, alaska thunderfuck, courtney act, vicky vox, willam belli, detox iCunt). The thing of it is, I still don't act in a feminine manner, I don't talk with a lisp, I'm perfectly confident in the fact that I am a cis-gendered (the gender I was assigned at birth suits the gender I am mentally) gay male. In a way, I sort of wish it was in my nature to act in a feminine manner, then people would be able to tell that I'm gay, and I probably would have had a boyfriend by now lmao.
No one can ever tell that I'm gay, and they're always shocked to find out. Also, it bothers me that so many people expect gay people to act feminine, I don't know, I personally feel that your sexual preference should not dictate personality. If it is your personality and what you naturally feel or how you respond to the world naturally, that's fine, but if it isn't the way that I respond to the world, then that's fine too, and I don't like having to explain my mannerisms to people that find out I'm gay.
I don't know, I'm rambling about bullshit that doesn't matter.
As far as drag performing goes, I can't sing, I don't have any talents...so yeah, that's out of the question. Besides, I bought some things today and I don't think they will work with me because my complexion is too fair. So I really need to save up and buy the expensive/good shit. Also, I like the makeup from an artistic point of view for the effects you can attain for a photograph but I still have no interest in women's clothing lmao, so I guess I really am not into drag or whatever.
I also need to save up so I can get the titanium out of my face and replace it with gold, but I'm poor. Lmao.
21:06 Oct 29 2014
Times Read: 536
Courtney Act is sort of...too bland for me, but the song is catchy and look at the men! Haha. I love how both her male and female persona are in the music video.
22:27 Oct 27 2014
Times Read: 562
Creature from the bitch lagoon. The bearded lady.
Also, the background is a photo I took this morning and then added to the image of me.
22:27 Oct 25 2014
Times Read: 594
I love this song but I wish that I had a "crew" like Adore's in this video. I did at one point but then I stopped staying with them...and for the last few years my life has been zero fun, but it's also no fun when one of your friends keeps having babies and you're like assigned to baby detail because no one cares enough to take care of their own child. But whatever.
Good song though.
Maybe I'll give them a call.
00:14 Oct 25 2014
Times Read: 640
I absolutely love Adore Delano. She is beautiful and her music is great. So. Freakin. Envious.
01:41 Oct 24 2014
Times Read: 687
That awkward moment when someone gives you negative honor for not making graphics for them and for choosing not to join their "coven". It's okay though, I mean...you still didn't get that crest, right? :D
22:32 Oct 23 2014
Times Read: 706
It seems appropriate that my one hundredth journal entry should be about joining a new society. Synchronicity. Everyone knows I don't stay in a single place for too long. I've joined yet another coven. A coven I made the crest for. :)
I may not be here too long should that house master be in a place in which she is finally able to take on that project she wanted my help with, or should I finally open my second coven. We'll see. :)
Also, unrelated vr note. I have a feeling...well you know that feeling you get when you're right on the cusp of falling into alignment with what the universe wants for you and you know what you're going to do is going to be huge? No...oh...well that's how I feel. If I do what I want to do, and I probably won't, I'm going to take the Internet by storm lmfao. In the very least, I'm going to garner a small following on a social media site. :)
But what I want to do is steeped in social stigma and could get me killed where I live.
I'm making my fourth crest for coven number two. So many ideas!!!
00:08 Oct 23 2014
Times Read: 738
Just made this really quick...alien-esque image. I don't really know how I feel about it, but whatever. I guess it's cool to see how I would look if I were an alien.
I went back and darkened the text a bit, but I'm not going to fool with uploading the new image to a photo hosting website and all that. You get the idea.
23:30 Oct 22 2014
Times Read: 740
If no one wants a mentorship banner or coven crest I am thinking of making myself a new stamp.
23:19 Oct 22 2014
Times Read: 741
I have some free time tonight, need a mentorship banner, coven crest, or scifi group image/banner/crest? Either for an existing group or for something you're think of of creating soon...let me know the details and I will be happy to make it happen!
Tomorrow I'm going to start working on a huge project for a friend. I should have started a week ago, but I just couldn't img myself to do it...it's such a huge project that the idea of it is daunting lol. Daunting in the sense that I am I certain whether or not it is something that I can actually do.
23:07 Oct 22 2014
Times Read: 744
A house master vaguely hinted at wanting me to help her with something, when she would able to under take the project. This was a while back, and I've got no clue when it will happen...but this house has always played a big part in the time I've spent here. As in, it happens to be one of the societies I always gravitate back to, I mean there have been times when I didn't feel like I necessarily fit in...as a member, but at the same time it was such an exciting place I just enjoyed being there. I can't wait to help her out, and not to rush her...but...hurry! Lol. Nah, I know she is pretty busy.
Also, I've picked the perfect song for the main page of my second coven. Yay for satan worshipping drag queens. :)
Now if only I could freaking sire my freaking profile. Ugh. Levels...why are you so difficult?!?!
It would probably help if I didn't spend all of my time here. How an alternate account became my primary account, I will never know, but I love experiencing vr from this particular profile. It makes no sense, considering every profile set up is the same in so far as what we can do here as regular members...but this profile...I don't know, it just feels like it has more going for it than my other accounts. Also, it is fairly easy to level, so that may be it? I don't know.
Also, from this profile I've tried to make myself forego my...picky ways in regards to members. I've tried to forget old grievances and help those that may be in need of graphics. I've tried to overlook the flaws in people that would have otherwise turned me off of wanting a conversation with them and I've tried to respond to their messages. From this profile I'm giving people chances, and giving myself the chance to experience a more active vampire rave than I do on my other profiles...because I had become a snob. I don't know that that is necessarily true, but it is easier to say that than it is to explain that I was more or less friends with tons of people that had left vr or stopped logging in, and well I was not willing to make new friendships because I was constantly comparing in-formed friendships with friendships that were awesome. This is lame.
Give me a second coven, please. Thanks.
23:53 Oct 21 2014
Times Read: 784
Just finished this image in photoshop. :)
Since I started making images for other people, crests and all that junk, I haven't had time to do many personal projects. I just threw this together really quickly. I've made almost this exact image before, but I took some new photos today and figured...why not? Just something fun to do anyway.
19:21 Oct 21 2014
Times Read: 795
Homosexuality, Drag queens, and Selfies.
I've got a problem with femininity in men. In the sense that I mean...by all means, be the person you feel you were meant to be. Act the way that comes to you naturally...but, but...but...and this is going to make me sound like I've got internalized homophobia rather than a preference but whatever, but...I feel like femininity in men only serves to perpetuate horrible stereotypes. I mean haven't you heard some people say, "stereotypes are rooted in truth...or else they wouldn't be stereotypes"? BLUGH. That being said...I've been watching DWV music videos and interviews all morning. Why? Because they're hilarious and beautiful. I prefer men to act as men, to be masculine, and all that but when it comes to comedy and entertainment...they're not really hurting anything I suppose, they're just raking in money by acting dumb as hell and that's awesome. I could not...I could never, bring myself to date a man that was into drag, as in personally conducted and performed in drag shows. A coworker tried to set me up with a guy that did drag. Reluctantly I spoke to him online a few times, and he was one of the most over bearingly annoying people I've ever spoken too...also, he felt perfectly comfortable crossing personal boundaries with someone he'd never even spoken to before. I don't like people like that. I like larger than life personalities, and have been accused on more than one occasion of having a huge, boisterous personality in person...and that's fine, but there's a difference between being confident, being sure footed...and being whiney and grabby and clingy...and well...bedazzeled. This makes me look horrible, but it's just not what I'm into. I want a dude that's like...manly and can do repairs around the house and fix a truck. Now...someone point me towards the nearest homo mechanic.
Also, I just took selfies for the first time in God knows how long. That's why I'm using the desktop to listen to music and mess around on vr/tumblr. I'm using my tablet to edit the photos. Nothing major, I still don't know how to make someone skinny, lmao. That's a joke. I wouldn't do that. I just like the look of images that are heavy on the contrast and shadows. Why did I take them? I felt like trying on a new nose ring I've had forever, and my antique dayak ear weights. :)
02:45 Oct 21 2014
Times Read: 813
I'm craving a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and men.
22:24 Oct 20 2014
Times Read: 825
Also...the lady that I made the most recent crest for...disbanded. She only had her coven for a very few days, but I know all about that. I was considering joining her coven and helping simply because she had no clue what was going on in her new capacity as coven master.
What's the key to remaining a coven master for so log after having such an awful track record? Life lessons learned. I know how to stick to something even when it isn't going the way you want, just because it is...inevitably...what you want. I know how to lead people. Besides all that, complete creative freedom in the aspect of coven master is what I prefer to being the member of someone else's coven. That being said, the fact that I do have my own coven allows me to be happy in taking part in other covens via alternate accounts.
I am looking to do my best to bring someone's vision into being. I don't want to take over a coven and make it suit my own personal interests...I want to make graphics and things for a coven master that suits their own interests and wants. I just want to help out or whatever.
I thought that, even though it wasn't my best, that the crest looked decent and I wish it had been used.
I still need to start on the images for my friend's profile. I will do that after I finally successfully complete this protection stamp that has been so difficult for me.
22:17 Oct 20 2014
Times Read: 828
I was supposed to have made a protection stamp for someone weeks ago. The thing of it is...I did. I wasn't happy with it, and while the guy was gracious and claimed to like it, he wasn't necessarily completely happy with the end result. I can understand why. The content of the protection stamp has proven to be the most...difficult thing that has ever been requested of me. Simply because the type of image I'm searching for apparently does not exist.
The person sent me an image he had settled on but I don't believe it will translate well when edited, it is just not the type of image that can be easily edited or removed from its background.
I'm going to try. I can at least do that.
Today has been an exceptionally sad day.
18:20 Oct 20 2014
Times Read: 842
I've been having coffee and watching castle. This episode is based on a bisexual vampire...that happened to be an artist. I can definitely identify with this character, except he is far more attractive than I could ever hope to be and well...I have no interest in women lmao. Also...he has a boyfriend, and men don't look twice at me. I find it so fascinating that he was part of a real life coven, this is something I would love to take part in...minus being staked and murdered.
Things have been awful for me. I don't talk much about it because it is all self imposed, but the thing of it is being trapped in an emotional routine of like self deprivation or whatever...is it's not easily broken. This time of year inspires so much change, but none of it will come to fruition.
I haven't physically drawn anything since getting photoshop....
PRIVATE ENTRY
00:23 Oct 20 2014
Times Read: 863
• • • • PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY • • • •
00:17 Oct 20 2014
Times Read: 864
A while back, when I first started using this really simplistic version of photoshop I started this large project. It's just a single image but it involves several other smaller images or layers. I need to go back and smooth the edges of each individual image to make it look cohesive. I need to do so much, but I stopped working on it because I couldn't decide who else to add. It is such a neat idea and it is going to look awesome when/if I ever complete it, and I'm sure I will...I'm just at a loss for who else to add to the image.
Also, like my kismet says I'm still looking for a new coven. Read my previous entries for my thinking on how I'm looking to choose a new coven.
23:16 Oct 19 2014
Times Read: 884
Once again, I'm a member of my own coven, Cognitive Fabrication. This is very much a temporary arrangement...until I'm approached by someone that legitimately needs the kind of help I'm willing to offer. Also, just because you message me asking to join your coven, I can and will decline your offer if your coven does not suit my interests. :)
22:22 Oct 19 2014
Times Read: 893
Im about to break an unspoken vr rule/commit a social taboo, and write about the society that I'm currently a member of. Haha.
So, I joined this coven due to the coven changing hands and getting a new master. This person is a member of cf on another account. She has been my friend much longer than she has been a member of my coven. She is a great person, and a really good friend. She's one of the better members of vampire rave. She is super intelligent and so creative, and driven. She has goals and aspirations that she actually accomplishes and reaches. Like I said, she has always been a very good friend to me and has helped my coven so much by being active when she can, that I felt like joining her coven and helping where I could simply being an active member. She allowed me to join...but little did I know that it simply was not necessary. This coven is a long standing society having been established a very long time ago. It has a decent amount of members and the majority of them have post numbers that range in the thousands. They are a very active bunch, one of the most active societies I've encountered on vr.
Which does not suit my needs in regards to this account. I applaud these positive attributes in a coven, but I initially wanted to join a coven in which a master needs help getting started or changing things that are just outdated in their mind. I want to help out by garnering an active atmosphere and by creating images for the new master or the master looking to start fresh.
I'm saying that I will most likely leave the coven I am in, but it isn't due to anything negative, as I stated this is one of the most active societies I've come across, and contains several kind members, and the master is a friend of mine. If you're looking for a new coven I strongly suggest you check it out, but I'm looking for an opportunity in which I can, until I start my second coven, put my recently found photoshop hobby to use.
If you're interested message me, not anyone at my coven.
05:03 Oct 19 2014
Times Read: 928
I just finished this crest. It isn't my best, but it is what the person wanted. I mean anything unique to her own specifications is best considering she is currently using a coven crest she found on a google image search that was a coven crest here on vr a long time ago.
It's a tree growing from a rose...which is what she wanted, I felt the image was lacking so I decided to add the roots, but my don't know...like I said it is not my best, but I think it will work for her.
Oh, also, the tree is blurred a bit because initially it looked way too sharp and staticky so this was the better alternative. I just wish I could have made it larger. Also something funky is going on with the text.
01:03 Oct 19 2014
Times Read: 944
I was supposed to have made a crest for someone but I actually forgot because work was so hectic this week. I barely got any decent sleep. I'm going to start on the forgotten crest after dinner.
23:26 Oct 18 2014
Times Read: 951
All of my images look the same.
But...maybe that isn't a bad thing, I mean every artist has a particular style.
23:10 Oct 18 2014
Times Read: 957
Two vr related things: I'm seeing a weird image under people's avatars in coven forums. Beneath all their society stuff where the bat should go if they've been here for a year or more. What is this image? I tried clicking it but was unable to do so.
I have a couple images to make for people, and then...I start the biggest project I've ever under taken. An entire profile...someone approached me and I would normally have said no, but she is a good person, and great friend. I'm Just afraid I won't be able to find images to use....
05:03 Oct 18 2014
Times Read: 991
"I just want to thank Oddity
for taking time out of his busy schedule, to make our current crest for us. Please take time and look through his journal and check out his latest creations! :)" - Taken from the Teutonic Order main page.
Just wanted to post this here. I smiled when I saw this on their coven page, having visited the main page to check out my crest in use. Haha. This is by far one of the best "credit to" links/coven page recommendations I've received, or that anyone has typed about me, and my work.
Scrolling through the list of covens, I counted four of my crests in use. It's a nice feeling.
My new goal is to...make a crest for a house.
04:54 Oct 18 2014
Times Read: 992
Just got home from work..I have been gone for what seems like twenty years.
17:56 Oct 17 2014
Times Read: 1,033
Just finished one of two crests I have to make. I think it looks nice. :)
07:00 Oct 17 2014
Times Read: 1,052
I'm about...half way through the first of two crests I need to make. I think it's going to look pretty good when I finish. Right now though...it has gotten pretty late, I've got to work tomorrow, and my headache from today has carried over into the night...but, I sort of don't want to go to bed until I've finished the first crest. I'm not sure though...I am just apprehensive about how much sleep I will get tomorrow morning.
16:35 Oct 15 2014
Times Read: 1,162
Just finished this crest. I've been awake for twenty-three or more hours. Also, I'm pretty sure this person has already submitted their info to cancer for this particular coven.
I'm actually happy with how this image came out.
As it is...I don't feel that things I make look like examples of digital art...I feel like they look like what they are...merged images. But...this is nice, I guess.
13:04 Oct 15 2014
Times Read: 1,178
I have had no sleep...literally. Work was grueling, as always. I hurt all over. Time actually went by pretty quickly, so that was a plus. Also, I noticed some things in what certain people did and said that confirmed something pretty incredible for me. Mind games and such. ;)
I really should get some sleep, but I just can't...not yet. Blugh.
I might try making something in photoshop.
I had something relevant to the site to say but someone was speaking to me and my sleep deprived mind forgot it all...that is so freaking bothersome.
00:28 Oct 15 2014
Times Read: 1,196
I used to make jewelry from horn and bone. Some people from vr happen to own pieces made by me. Some bought theirs, while one piece, my favorite piece, was given to my favorite vr user as a birthday gift. In fact, the first piece I made and sold, was sold to a vr user. I will never forget the user that bought the first piece from me, it was such a positive experience for me in the sense that it was the first time I sold something I considered to be art...it was just such a gratifying experience. The member that purchased that piece of jewelry was so happy with the necklace...I was happy for that. I miss making jewelry...I have plenty of supplies, I should start making things again. I just don't...really do much of anything anymore. I've stopped drawing. Pretty much my only creative outlet these days is photoshop. It's sad, but for some reason, I don't know, I feel like I lack the energy to do these things but I think it is more than that, I think I may lack the will to do these things. I don't know, I want to do them, but more than that...I don't want to do anything. Not because I'm lazy but more so just from a lack of interest.
I feel awful.
I need to make jewelry again, I feel like all it would take is one new piece and I will immediately fall into the old routine of making a piece a day.
I really was good at making the things that I made.
...In fact, I think that I have a piece of horn ready...all I need to do is attach it to something and I'm done. It was the last piece I started on but never finished. I should, tomorrow some time, try putting it together and see if completing this last...really old project, brings back any sort of spark, or will to create these things again.
23:41 Oct 14 2014
Times Read: 1,203
I'm about to make a dumb connection/observation. People come to me for graphics, most recently people have come to me for protection stamps. I've been reading up on the occult in some capacities just because of a mild interest. I've also watched a few like forty minute long short documentaries, and of course we all know that people used to, and some people still do, go to "witches", or whatever, for like charms and talismans for various purposes. I don't know, this is going to sound lame, but I feel the same way with people coming to me for graphics haha.
23:12 Oct 14 2014
Times Read: 1,209
Pretty sure that I just typed and sent the longest message to a vr user that has ever been sent on this site.
But...religious beliefs, mythologies and cultural concepts are just such fascinating things.
Ugh, I have work tonight, so I should start on that stamp but I'm too busy dreading this junk.
05:31 Oct 14 2014
Times Read: 1,227
I'm thinking of creating a mentorship on one of my higher level accounts just for the sake of...having something to create graphics and pages for; I probably won't.
23:04 Oct 13 2014
Times Read: 1,252
I'm watching the taboo episode changing sex, and well, Balian Buschbaum is so inspiring...and just flat out gorgeous.
22:18 Oct 12 2014
Times Read: 1,291
I found this image saved to my photoshop program. It is a crest, sort of, that I made back when I first got/started using the program. I think it looks neat to be so simple, and to be one of my earliest projects.
21:25 Oct 12 2014
Times Read: 1,307
I just finished this for a member. Not sure how he feels about it yet. If he likes this particular design, I may try recreating it from scratch because some parts of my editing don't look quite right to me. If he wants something else entirely, I will be willing to try a few more designs. Overall, besides one or two points I would like to...try again, I love this design/idea.
22:54 Oct 11 2014
Times Read: 1,334
Someone requested that I make them a protection stamp. This guy has always been kind/respectful when I have messaged him from time to time, so of course I agreed...no problem. Also, he had a fairly unique suggestion as far as image content goes...but the design is pretty much up to me. I love that kind of creative freedom.
There is a problem though...I am not finding any images I feel I could use or incorporate in the image in an...aesthetically pleasing manner, and I'm getting frustrated haha.
Wish me luck.
Also, if we talk regularly I may enlist your help in hunting down images!
22:10 Oct 11 2014
Times Read: 1,347
I have hit the gold mine. I have found and am currently watching the taboo channel on youtube. Currently watching, Taboo: Witchcraft. I had no idea that they had a channel. I'm so glad I stumbled upon it, also...obviously, finding this channel is the gold mine to which I was referring.
:)
I need to buy new books. I need to know more about the occult, in all its forms.
Any time I find a new book on some aspect of this larger subject and read the book...I just feel...I don't know, it just feels like it makes sense, like I'm reading something I've always felt...only put into words. I don't know, I sound lame.
I'm a very realistic person, I just like learning these types of things because it is...fun to feel like there is more than just the mundane.
It's just interesting. Not only the beliefs and processes, but the origins, the major players (Crowley for instance, my most recent read) through out history, all of it.
23:14 Oct 10 2014
Times Read: 1,369
I just posted the longest ad in the classifieds...I feel that I was way too honest haha. He probably won't sell.
22:54 Oct 10 2014
Times Read: 1,377
Just..."thinking out loud" in a sense. I have a sire account and am a coven master...I have two other accounts that are fairly close to sire...as well as several other profiles. A long time ago, I promised several people that I would put profiles in their covens/houses, but have yet to do that. The reason being that I am trying to sire my two "almost sire" accounts...and well, it has taken me a lot longer than I originally thought it would. I have made serious progress since withdrawing my accounts and putting them in my own society...but have a while still before I will sire these accounts and be able to disperse them and put my attention else where.
When I do, I hope to use one sire account to create a second coven. I might put the third sire account in a House that I was a fairly active member in, and subsequently when leaving I promised the master that I would be back, or I will use it to society hop and put another account in that house. I have a friend here that is unable to hold the position of society master on her main account but is a coven master on another so I may put a profile in that coven. A lady wants my help completely changing her society/alliance, and this society has played a huge role in my time here on vr, particularly the early days so I hope to do that as well. I don't know, there are a lot of things I would like to do here but it all starts as soon as I stop being lazy and make the necessary advancements. It will also be a lot more to keep up with than I am used to as I rarely ever log onto my lower level profiles except for this one. I don't know, as scatter brained as I am, this may prove to be impossible. I never really liked having more than one profile, but some how...one thing tends to lead to another....
Suddenly, just thinking about this, I feel overwhelmed haha.
22:29 Oct 10 2014
Times Read: 1,384
I'm supposed to be working on some images.
A friendship stamp for myself and a good friend.
A protection stamp...with a rather unique design in mind. The person suggested a theme, I will come up with and implement my own design. ;)
An alliance crest for someone that I previously made a coven crest for.
Right now though, I'm taking a break from photoshop, until later this evening. I also noticed that a woman that I made a coven crest for...for a coven that was not yet created, has deleted her account. At any rate it says, no such user...maybe she has just changed her name? Hopefully she still intends to use the image I made for her.
I can not wait to be a coven master. I have way to many themes and crest designs in my head...but all center around the same basic idea. This coven will be a blast.
If you want something made now would be the time to ask because I will have some free time the next four days.
04:16 Oct 10 2014
Times Read: 1,402
I think tomorrow...I might try to make something for myself, something elaborate. As it is, I'm not feeling so great about the things I have made in photoshop. Since acquiring photoshop I haven't drawn anything...you know, physically drawn, maybe tomorrow. We'll see.
03:55 Oct 10 2014
Times Read: 1,414
Just finished this stamp for Theodora. I hope she approves.
23:45 Oct 09 2014
Times Read: 1,427
Soon, after dinner, I'm going to start working on a rating stamp for Theodora. She has an interesting idea or suggestion, so it should be fun.
If any of you other friends and acquaintances of mine would like something made, please let me know and I will see what I can come up with.
The requests have seriously slowed to a stop.
I need to regroup my thoughts/creative process and get back to making images for myself, of my own design/inspiration. You know, if the requests are over and done with.
22:46 Oct 09 2014
Times Read: 1,448
There's just something about DawnoftheDead...we think in such a similar fashion. Maybe she doesn't think so, and maybe I should correct myself by saying, we have some very similar interests and ideas. It always makes for a good conversation.
21:56 Oct 09 2014
Times Read: 1,462
I found a song called "the cult of Dionysus" and...I'm in love.
Back in school...people would literally fight over who got to sit beside me. Heated arguments. It was nice. I wish I was still in an environment in which I could...have that kind of an effect on people, I want to start a cult devoted to Dionysus.
21:38 Oct 08 2014
Times Read: 1,481
logged on to quite a few messages, all from decent people, all positive things, so yeah...I don't know, just felt like making a note.
About to listen to/watch some documentaries.
23:05 Oct 07 2014
Times Read: 1,497
Should I start a portfolio or just be content with displaying the images that I make here, in my journal?
...Hmm....
21:51 Oct 05 2014
Times Read: 1,539
In my previous entry I posted a link to a video posted on youtube by a girl that claims to channel spirits and entities. Seriously watch her videos, particularly her interview series with Anton Lavey.
She has some interesting ideas, I'm not sure that they are original or unique, but they are intriguing.
Also, I just wanted to point out that if you watch her videos...say you watch the Crowley video, and then the Anton video...her use of words doesn't change. She still over uses the word fascinating.
I don't know, I'm sure she is faking, it is fairly obvious...and I mean should an authentic case of channeling occur, wouldn't your vernacular change to accommodate that of the being you are hosting?
Also, Anton did not believe in a god figure or satan figure in the literal sense, in the static bible it states explicitly that the belief in a god entity, or any entities, is a symptom of poor mental health.
What do you think of the videos?
21:19 Oct 05 2014
Times Read: 1,545
Apparently after two nasally, deep breaths she claims to be channeling Crowley. I don't buy it. Not at all. It's obvious she thinks it's a joke as well.
02:39 Oct 05 2014
Times Read: 1,609
Just finished the alliance crest I have been working on. I tried using the warp tool on the text...and well...I need more practice. I also feel like this image came out blurry...some how, or for some reason, but there isn't anything I can do about that because I created this image exactly the same way that I have created the others.
Hm....
22:48 Oct 04 2014
Times Read: 1,626
I'm not trying to be negative, but uh...if you're a catfish, and you're still using photos of emo/scene kids from 2006...step your game up.
Also, rating someone something other than a ten is not cyber bullying.
00:12 Oct 04 2014
Times Read: 1,656
Tons of people have asked if I am willing to create "protection stamps". I have declined their requests each and every time. A couple of people have asked me to make stamps and banners, and for the most part I have declined these requests...except for the occasional stamp.
I have done so for quite a few reasons, the most notable being the following:
I am new to photoshop. I am only comfortable with attempting certain things. Besides that, I don't feel that the things I make are that good. I mean, if the people requesting these things think my work is decent enough to have me make something like that...I suppose that I could, I'm just not comfortable with doing so. The reason I usually give them is that protection stamps require quite a bit of text, and I don't think I could create an image that could support that much text without an essential piece of the image being covered by text. As far as rating stamps and banners go, for some reason images that I make that are wider than they are tall/rectangular in shape just don't look that great. They just look...wrong. I mean I guess it just takes practice, but as it is, I don't like the rating stamps that I make. I am most comfortable with creating crest like images right now.
Also, while I like the idea of protection stamps, and definitely used them in my earlier days on vr...I just don't like them now. By that I mean, I like them in so far as it's a nice gesture to want to have an image you can give to friends as a token of your friendship but as far as protection goes...I mean, you don't really need it here. Yeah, friends are great, you can tell them your current worries and concerns and hopefully they will listen and offer advice, but protection? It is a nice gesture, but...I don't know.
Anyway, the point of this entry is, I might give making a protection stamp or two a try, but I really prefer creating crests.
22:12 Oct 03 2014
Times Read: 1,664
I'm admitting that my reading has been of an esoteric/occult bent lately...but the thing of it is, I don't feel anymore informed for it, I feel like everyone talks in circles. I think maybe I just haven't found the right book yet.
As far as Crowley goes, I think he did wonders for spreading the occult...if not so much when he was alive, then in the sixties, a decade or two after his death. Other than that, in my mind, he is just a very interesting man. I will be reading more books about him, and some of his personal work.
I want to read something more informative on the occult.
Also, I read a little about a book written by, or well I think it was written by an author I already love, it is about early man's mind, and how he lacked the internal voice/thought that we have now and that in certain moments of clarity when he felt an impulse or felt he was told to do something...he was just...having thoughts, but this came to be known as the voice of god.
This theory was explained so much more eloquently than what I have put here.
I want to get back into my meditation which I haven't done in such a very long time.
I want some form of...not enlightenment, I want some form of knowledge. I want...what so many people claim to have, the ability to affect the physical world through ritual...or at the very least I want to read as many books on esoteric and occult subjects to form my own opinion as to whether or not...well...I don't want to say because as it stands, it would undermine my current beliefs.
This is confusing.
I want some form of understanding.
I want to read more books!
Luckily I have some I haven't read yet of a semi occult subject.
21:51 Oct 03 2014
Times Read: 1,667
I finished my book today. I suppose I should choose another.
00:33 Oct 03 2014
Times Read: 1,684
As far as what I do in photoshop goes...I just take bits and pieces from images and put them together in one image. I "merge" pieces of images together and try to make them look cohesive. I really want to know how people "create" entire images. Is that something they do? I can't really explain what I mean because I don't know how it is done. Catch 22 right? Ha.
...Wait...that phrase does apply...?
22:07 Oct 01 2014
Times Read: 1,707
I have made tons of images for people, and while they may not have been perfect...the people these images were for have been happy. It is great practice, and I don't so much mind because I know what it is like to have to come to someone and ask for graphics. No matter if that person is a friend, or if that person is just really nice about it...it still feels awkward. I am trying to be...I don't know how to explain it, I am just trying to help anyone out that wants me to make them something. But...thinking about all of these images I have made for free...man, if I had charged these people....
Haha.
Nah, I probably won't charge. ;p
Also, I have been asked to make an alliance crest, and I still have to type up my list of rules for people to follow when approaching me about making them something. Guidelines, really, that make the exchanging of ideas...easier.
21:32 Oct 01 2014
Times Read: 1,717
My weirdly uptight, Christian boss surprised me today when she noticed I was reading a book on my break...I have been doing so for the past few weeks now, the same book, because I only read on breaks. She confessed she had peeked at the title, she actually knew who Aleister Crowley was, and knew some info about his life. I was shocked.
03:14 Oct 01 2014
Times Read: 1,075
Just finished making this stamp for RoyalZombie. I swear, I have the toughest time making stamps....
00:17 Oct 01 2014
Times Read: 988
I can't really remember who I was supposed to photoshop something for, except for one guy, which I know for sure I was supposed to make a stamp. I'm almost certain that I am caught up, except for him. So, after I make his stamp, I think I am going to take the time to make the active members of cf a stamp...which is going to be difficult because I'm the worst at making stamps.
Also, I will be typing up rules for having something made by me and posting them here, and possibly on my profile. Here, because I can link someone to the rules easily, but I could do so if I posted them on my profile by using an anchor link...hm...we'll see.
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COMMENTS
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PerfectlyDamned
01:46 Nov 01 2014
Oddity
21:53 Nov 01 2014
Psh, coding and all that junk...you might as well be speaking a foreign language. I used to be decent at HTML and CSS coding, but now...I'm stuck with the really basic coding lmao. I took a long, long break from vr, and it's like...in the process of taking that break I've forgotten everything I knew about coding. Everything. My brain mushed out on me.